Thursday, December 27, 2012

The Truth About Self-Harm


       Self harm is a practice that is often misunderstood. If you self harm or someone you know self harms, or you suspect they do, please read

                              People self harm for numerous reasons. Each person is unique in their pain. Each person handles it differently. It is a way to release what is pent up inside. When everything becomes too much it is all that is left.

Most people think self harm is just cut. It is not. Self-injury includes but is not limited to cutting oneself, burning/scalding/branding oneself, overdoses taken with the intent to simply harm rather than kill, bone breaking, punching/kicking walls or other objects which would cause injuries if punched/kicked/etc, interfering with wound healing, scratching oneself, biting oneself, embedding objects in the skin, self-hitting, headbanging (these two are more commonly seen in younger children,) excessive nailbiting, skin picking, or hair pulling which causes injury/bleeding, or some people even broaden the definition to include things like eating disorders, excessive drinking, and drug use, since these are conscious behaviors which also harm oneself, though in less obvious ways. 
The basic definition of self-injury, though, is any act done with the intention to injure oneself that results in a cut, bruise, injury, or other form of damage. Also, the damage has to be severe enough to be visible, or, in cases of overdoses, for instance, cause health damage.                                        
   A lot of times you will never know a self-harmer by appearance. Some are ashamed of their scars, of what they are feeling . It must remain hidden at all costs. They learn to smile through the pain and act like nothings wrong.
Here are some signs to look for:
Scars, such as from burns or cuts
Fresh cuts, scratched or other woundsBruises
Hair loss or bald spots
Broken bones
Keeping sharp object on hand
Spending a lot of time alone
Wearing long sleeves or long pants even in summer
Claiming frequent accidents
Obvious self injury.


Lying becomes a way of life. You might not get the truth from just asking. Self harm is almost NEVER a suicide attempt. it's a release, a way to become numb.

Other's a very obvious with their self harm. This is for attention. Some people scorn that but if they are willing to hurt themselves to get it, don't they really need it?

Sometimes it doesn't make sense, why they hurt themselves. They are proud of their scars, but hate them as well.
If you have ever considered self harming DO NOT START. It will overtake you mind. it becomes all you can think about. it becomes who you are. You can never be good enough.

It is not often recognized as an addiction. But it is. Once you do it your stuck wanting to do it the rest of your life. Don't expect people to just be able to stop. They need help stopping. And it's easy to relapse especially when left alone. Don't give up on them. They make understanding friends when it's all said and done. They've been through a lot. Sometimes they can be self centered and want to talk about their problems all the time. Just listen. They trust you enough to open iron walls. Don't hurt them more. Just stay with them. You mean more than you know.

If you self harm, I know it's hard to tell someone, but find someone you trust and TELL them!  If there is no one there, go to the internet. That sounds like awful advice but you can find trusted friend who will understand you there. You need to quit. There are people who understand. It's a dark place to be, don't get lost there. You might not believe me now but there IS hope. Check our To Write Love On Her Arms
You can be saved from this Hell. I know it seems impossible, but there is a way out.
Check out this song, it's helped me a lot:

 You ARE beautiful. Sure, not everyone is outwardly beautiful but inside everyone has something to offer. You believe that, right? Or do you believe that for everyone but you. You out of the billions of people are the only one who doesn't matter? Think a second... Does that make sense? No it doesn't. You're worth so much. Don't let other people or their words define you.
Please do not judge a self harmer. They are hurting more than you can possibly imagine. A lot of times it is a side affect of a mental disorder.   Don't say you understand if you've never done it. YOU DON'T!!!
 This is NOT a joking matter. Teasing someone about it or taking it lightly hurts so much.
Be aware. Words hurt. Every one if felt, even if you can't see it. People are good actors. Most of them have low self esteem and you drive them closer and closer to the edge. 


  1. A very inspiring post! I love it! I feel bad sometimes... I mean, real bad, I smile, I lie, and nobody knows. But I only hurt myself to give me focus. Pain gives me focus- Darth Maul said that.
    I'm sorry for your pain. Be strong :)

    1. Thank you :) I know how it feels to feel "real bad" and being letting it help you focus is great! Thanks for the read!